Every Word I speak I give you a piece of my soul...To give you the peace of my soul...

Unborn

2006-09-25T23:22:00.000-07:00

Today I woke to the silent screams of lost infants
With the breaths they never took
In the back of my throat
And their mother’s dead hope
Tight roping my soul
My heart has never been so cold
Cause all they know is shatter dreams
And broken homes
And a sorrow that sorry just doesn’t make right…
Listen to the tears
Cause even a baby who is born still born
Still cries through there mother’s eyes
You see a mother puts her life in a child so in a way
They both died inside…
Now the question
God why?
Runs parallel to the thoughts of suicide in her mind
She can only fantasize of what it’s like
To feel her child’s heart beat against hers
But deaf skies don’t answer prayers
And fallen angels don’t fly quite the same
After they’ve felt the pain of hell’s pavement
Just imagine
What it’s like to have your first breath taken
And swapped with your last
Just ask the father who never got to hear his son’s laugh
He’ll tell you everything with just one look…

The only reason he still smiles
Is because his hopes are hooked on the bed of clouds
His son rests his head on
And every night he climbs on the roofs of stars
Sings lullabies in the sky
So his voice can become his arms
Just so he can put his hands on his son’s heart as he majestically sleeps
And every key he sings unlocks
Galaxies of unborn dreams
So he and his son
Can fly free like fireflies
Burning the night skies
And right before the sunrises
He quietly tip toes on moonbeams
Gently stepping over cracked wings
Back to a backward where
The only thing that swings on the swing set is the wind

Now See by then his son’s silent screams woke me
And he was choking on the last words of his song
Never wanting it to end…

Through the blurs of my soul’s window
I watched him
And couldn’t help but think that
The only thing worse than dying
Is never getting the chance to live.

Concrete Sand

2006-09-18T06:54:00.000-07:00

Your smile comes from the deepest parts of heaven
The place where angels pray
And God puts his hand on grey clouds
to create rainbows
Just imagining a day without you is painful
And see sometimes I want to travel through your dimples
Explore the galaxies that unfold when you giggle
Leap from star to star
Till I touch every part of your happiness
And you find your wishes on the tips of my kisses
That I blow to you from that paradise

I've never gazed in a pair of eyes
More mesmorizing that yours
And when I do
I start memorizing events that
Have only occured in a past life

You were a pastor's wife
and I was merely a pasture boy
Who admired you from a distance
And my day as only complete
When you passed by the fields
Giving me the opportunity to catch a glimpse
Of everything good God ever created
You... always gave me a gesture of your kindness

In today's world I'm still just a boy transcending into manhood
With blind eyes letting my heart direct the flow of my destiny
Sometimes questioning each beat
But you seem to be there to answer my wonders
So is there any wonders to why it is that I say I love you
Yes.
I have made mistakes in my life
But there is not one thing that I would undo
Because everything I've done has led me to you
and that in its self is beautiful

For so long you've tip toed on the side walks of my dreams
With violins playing between your every move
Soothing my soul knowing you'll be here soon
Even if you take water breaks along the way
I'll sit here patiently for the day your journey ends
And ours begins on the softest promises made in the manger of Bethlehem
When you decide to take my hand
We'll write poems of us in concrete sand
So years from now not even wind
Will contest with our travels

But for right now...
Lets let life unravel in our palms
And fly with the songs in the wind

A Soldier's Tale

2006-07-07T18:34:00.000-07:00

Bullets penetrating pulses of soldiers
Blurry eyes make black skies and
These lies disguise facts
That it’s a jungle out here literally
And the atmosphere is filled with extra air
Due to the fact there’s less men breathing
But our blood’s forever leaving indention in the trees so we’re eternal through all seasons
Through this soldier’s eyes I’m looking for a reason why
My finger keeps squeezing when I don’t believe it
And there’s no sight much like the one when
I looked inside my enemy’s eyes right before I took his life
And saw me in him
Yo it’s a jungle out here and I’m just trying to survive

I mean in the blink of an eye
I could be gone
And I don’t want to make a friend
Cause on the likely hood of things he won’t be here tomorrow
So I spare my sorrow and catch my tears before they fall
And I tried to write a letter to my mom
But every sentence I had to erase the pain of the paper
So the only thing I could simply say to her was

Captain said we’ll be home soon
Don’t worry your baby boy is doing fine

p.s. Mom I love you…

But I lied
I’m not doing fine yesterday I was in an ambush and
Got shot at five times
And I swear that last bullet…
Well that last bullet barely missed
Grazed my eye lids and heart at the same time
And I can still hear the hollow tip’s wind
As it whispered death in my ear
Here I’ve learned never fear or trust a man on this Earth
I’ve been bundled in a tandem of curses
With blood on my finger tips of a random person
Just to stand it hurts cause…
The guilt weighs heavy on my shoulders
I’m holding on to a thread of life
A thread of sanity
I can’t sleep at night and the only thing that keeps me right is my family
My wife at home
A two year old son
And a baby girl that’s just been born
But how do I tell them that
Her husband
Their daddy
Wakes up every morning and clocks in to kill
Lace my boots up with prayers as I roam through lower level hell and
Watch angels fall…
I’ve ignored that final call for too long
So now I just plug my ear in fear
See…
I’m scared
I’m scared to listen to the war noises
Cause God might call my name in the midst of the screams
And I’m not ready for him to attach my angel wings
Just yet
Vietnam can not equal my death…
My pulse must keep pumping…
But it didn’t …
So everyone who receives this
Tell my mom, my wife, and my kids that I love them
And I never lied when I told them I was home bound
Cause Family
I’m home now…

Footprints

2006-06-11T15:58:00.000-07:00

Left only with her footprints on my heart
Now in this journey of mine for love
Im forced to restart
With my tear drops on the fall
Im asking God for the same advice he gave
Noah right he built his arch
But I dont know if its right for me to march
Up that ramp and through them doors
When I know the half Im supposed to have is missing
And Im trying to listen
To the words of best friends
That its in my best interest
To keep a safe distance from her
Cause she is my weakness
She knows the blue print of my heart
And seeps in the parts
Where the cement doesnt lay quite as thick
And just when I think my foundation is sturdy enough
To get close to her
I crumble
I just wish there wasnt so much to regret
I just wish this tree wasnt conceived with a rotten seed
And see I just wish her and I could be
WE
Id even settle for some form of friendship
Like call her just to ask her how her day went
But now a days a conversation
Lies somewhere between
When pigs fly
And when Mike Myers finally dies
I mean do you know what its like to stare into they eyes
Of the person you love the most
And see nothing but a ghost
Lately I cant even walk by a rose
Without her strolling through rows of my
Heart, Mind, and Soul
Since the day she walked away Ive never really found my way home
And seconds well theyve never seem so long and
I know she sees past this sewn on smile
And honestly its getting hard for me to breathe
Cause Im chocking on all the I love yous
Im forced to hold back
If only I could grasp times hand
And take back all the times
She cried her self to sleep
And selfish me
Well I still think I deserve her
Cause if clothed her naked eye
She would see that I am more than just
An inevitable broken heart
But still I dont know why Im holding on
To a love that she just ignores
To scared to explore the land she and I birthed
So here I stand hurt
Just a shadow of a forgotten memory
Left only with her footprints on my heart

Mirror

2006-05-13T14:28:00.000-07:00

See I know this girl who loses her self in a bottle…
To hollow her heart by corrupting her veins and brain
With the bittersweet effect of liquors taste
Just to get rid of her past distain
And everyday it rains cause her guardian angel isn’t able…
To choke back them tears
And put back the pieces of her shattered heart
She’s losing sight of God
Forgetting why Jesus bled upon that cross
She hides her scars with make-up
With hopes that that will make up and make her
Forget everything that’s ever made her hate her self
All the while she disguises what lies in her heart with lies…
That maybelline façade she puts on is ruined every time her eyes get flooded with regret
And yet she tells me
NOTHINGS WRONG…

But “A true friend is someone who knows the song in your heart and can sing it back to you when you’ve forgotten the words”

So let me carry this melody for you
You no longer have chug down your pain
Let the light of truth that shines in the crevices in the words of my lines help you find what you’ve misplaced
And if you ever feel your plate is too full
And the weight on your shoulders is too heavy give me your burdens and
I’ll burry you worries in the same grave
Where your heart stays
Cause I love you till my dying days
Despite your faults that would turn most men away I just don’t stay …
I COME CLOSER
With hopes of curing you of your sickness that supposedly doesn’t exist
And I wish I could answer your prayers
I mean I want to give you a solution to save ya,
Be your savior…
But I’m only a man who knows how to transform life into words
But maybe I can take a hold of your hand and we can dance away the pain to the songs angels sing
And in time I’ll build a home in the clouds so we can have a key to heaven
But for now you can sleep on my chest …
So you can dream on my heart
Find peace in tomorrow
And do away with your sorrows
I mean put your pain on the back burner
No longer let the past linger and concern you
Find paradise in my eyes
And I’ll give you a reason to be alive
Just hold on
When they expect you to fall off
You know I’m the one person you can always call on…

I just want to tell her these words
To nourish her nerves
So she can flourish with courage
But I can’t…
I mean I want to…
But every time I help her pain
I get hurt
Cause everything I say just gets tossed in the dirt…forgotten and worthless
Much like the way she sees herself…

Peace of my Soul

2006-05-11T19:25:00.000-07:00

Every word I speak I give you a piece of my soul...
To give you the peace of my soul
And the old saying goes home is where the heart is
So maybe you can find a home you’ve never known of inside this poem when you feel heartless
When it seems all the clouds you prayed to have hardened and
The light at the end of the tunnel has darken
Listen to my messages cause these are from the father
These pages are much like the stones that held the 10 Commandments
Sacred beyond understanding
And I know I don’t have all the answers
But I hold my pen “The Passion”
That puts the soul of Jesus Christ in the sols of my nikes so I can walk with him
But if you ever need to borrow my kicks I will offer them
That’s just my daily offering
Placing stars in a blank black sky so I can guide the lost men
And help all the children
Cause honestly I’m sick of seeing kids walking around with closed eye lids
Protecting their soul’s from the harsh visuals of reality
But see this I know this child
Spiritual scars resides in his eyes
And every day he prays to God to be blind
I mean he fights his sight and
Screams to the skies
But no one seems to listen
He is so desperate…
He says his prayers in sign language hoping Jesus can read his fingers
And defeat his demons that’s been shadowing him since semen
Yo I can’t seeing him
He’s in the fog of my breath when it’s cold outside
This is why I speak of peace
So he can find a place where he don’t have to hide from hate
And disguise the tears on his face with toughness
Wishing someone loved him
He just chalks up his tragedies as lessons of fate
With no blessings to this day
I just want to write away his pain
So he can ride away on clouds filled with rhyme
As the sun sets on his tears
and Rises to his Smile

God heres my Pen
If you can draw temporary angel wings on my back
So I can take the weight off the world's back
And fly it away so they can be as free as me...
He said, " Son since day one you've been an Angel on Earth
You know how to do away their hurt..."

So as I speak inhale the pieces of my soul
So everytime you breathe
You breathe
The Peace of my Soul

This Aint Just A Poem

2006-05-02T18:10:00.000-07:00

Let me expose my soul
To those who chose to pay attention to this prose
Just know the words pumping through the speakers
It aint me speaking
Its the blood Jesus bled,
the slaves Moses led,
the songs David sang,
Gabriels angels spreading inside of me
Lighting the Flame of inspiration
So I can travel to a destination of greatness through these pages
Come on this stage and change the brain waves of today
With just a poem
But this aint just poem
This is a reflection of how
I thought my life was in God's palms but
I slipped through the cracks of His finger tips
and fell from grace literally
Than felt the Devil's fist
pressing against my chest
shortening my breaths
cutting of my air supply
But never my creative circulation
So his hopes of crushing my hopes on Life's pavement
Is a waste of time
Cause I've died Before
But I was reborn and reformed in Rhyme
I'm spiritually connected with the struggle of survival
The heat from hell's fire try to turn my heart cold
But I part ways from that artic breeze
Now I sneeze on the Mic To Bless You
and to let you know
if you even deter from the path God paved for you
the angels will angle you to the direction
That'll take you to and through Heaven's Pues
and the sight of God will fuel a flame that'll ignite a fuse in you
To do what WE ARE ALL DESTINED TO DO
and as the words spue from my tongue
they burn my lips to boil your blood
Build homes in your lungs and become one with every breath you take
and our heartbeats and mindframes become parallel
and we set sail to a relm beyond revolutionary speak
beyond political badger and
preachers who preach for peace
Beyond POETRY
now everything in me from the wisdom to the determination that nearly kills me
I recieved from the Powers that Be
So the first thing you see when God unlocks the locks to Heaven's Gates
Is me on this stage
See This... this aint just a poem
This is a reflection of how I had to endure the agony of the Cross on my back
To put myself back into God's palms
So if we never speak again
Know I bled Christ through my pen
To show you exactly
WHO I AM

To You ... The Uknown

2006-05-01T23:01:00.000-07:00

Lately I’ve been thinking of what it would be like to see
The face of an ANGEL…
I mean converse with her in this verse and tell her…
I want to write poems in circles to take place of your halo…
Kiss your skittle lips so I can taste the rainbow
Many nights I stayed up thinking only of your eyes…
Wondering if they would be the same shade as heavens gates
And when you'd open them I would see blessing flee free
Like beams of light from clouds
I dream for to wrap your angel wings around my body and give me hugs that are heaven sent…
Just a second of your presence I could grace eternity
Graze your finger tips and feel perfection…
Feel all of life’s lessons rush through my veins in that single second…
See it’s impossible for me to give an explanation of how…
I don’t know really know you girl…
But I love know I love you girl…
See I know been somewhere in another world...
Hearing my thoughts and
Seeing my dreams
Serenading my soul
Every time that you breathe…
Occasionally I can feel your breath against my skin
It’s like streams of Zion
Giving me my second wind
Rising once again like him
Through you…
Believe everything I say is true…
I would never raise my voice
Or give you a reason to tarnish my word
And if its my actions that speak
I’d make sure everything I do would scream “I love you!”
So you can hear and see my love at the same time
And Find a heaven that ANGELS have yet to be exposed to
There’s sometimes that you need to know
Its just sometimes on those lonely nights
I go outside to stare at the sky and theres always this one star shining a light that seems made for me
And Ive come to the conclusion that, that is you in a form of destiny
See I feel such a bliss just thinking that you might exist
My high hopes light life in a flame
I call you my rekindled faith
And in reflections of my soul I see
you!
You just don’t know Id lay rose pedals across your bed,
Spread seas like Moses
So we could walk to a better life with ease
And when we reach our destination of peace and tranquility and just lie in the reformed Garden of Eden
Plant seeds of Love that'll protect us from
A snake thats been known slither through and
Tempt temptations with bitter fruit
I’m saying the perfect world would be just me and you
Only If knew who I was speaking to

The Last One

2006-03-26T14:06:00.000-08:00

They say love is blind; well you opened the eyes of my heart to things only blind men can see…
See I think God put his light in you to enlighten me on what life should be
And if he were to ever tell me the name of my Soul Mate
I’m sure YOU would be topic of conversation
Your beauty is the inspiration that wrote the Book of David
And pushed back The Revelations
My Genesis is the day we kissed and from that moment
We’ve traveled through Exodus and Leviticus
Felt that feeling that was spoken of in 1st Corinthians chapter 4
Love is Patient, Love is Kind…
Sometimes I wanna ask the Lord what was going on his mind when he created this Angel
I think he spent extra time on your Halo…
I mean I know no one is perfect but you left an indention in my heart that matches with perfection
The glare from your pupils must be heaven sent
The way they got me writing testaments every second
And spilling prophecy
Girl… you make me Holy
Purified the hole in me with this thing called Love…
Inserted it in my blood stream so you became me
Sewed your soul in my pen and you became my poetry
See I thought we would be soldiers of Eternity
Strolling through the Road of Destiny with no plans of ever exiting
But the pavement became slippery from the tears God shed over lies, pain, and misery
And even to this day it’s a mystery how the simplicity of love is so complex
We don’t wanna give up but
Our hearts are grasping for breath
Fighting death
Sighing over regret
For signing what was so blessed so carelessly
If heaven has any air to spare please
We’ve fallen on knees in this time of despair
Praying for a breeze to sweep through our Souls
And save that thin thread of hope that we hold…
So God could you make it possible…
For all the angels in heaven and on earth to breathe simultaneously to give us what we need for a chance of a survival?
See I’m not asking for riches or a perfect life,
I’m asking for a blessing and for you to flip your switch so she can once again possess your light…
Maybe she’ll see the things my blind heart sees
I’m just praying for that breeze…
That gust of wind that can blow away all of our sins…
Baby…Only if you knew how many pens lost their lives due to the words I wrote for you
I spilt the blood of our love on these pages…
So this ink is immortal…
Each syllable is a portal that leads to a time when time stood still and every moment seem too good to be real…
So if you feel our history dwindling in your membrane take this poem and never let those memories fade…

“TODAY TWO SOLDIERS OF ETERNITY WERE SLAINED”

God it’s ok that your breath never came…
I’m beginning to understand that love is blessed pain…
And we are the construction workers on Destiny’s road creating or closing another lane with every decision that we make…
But I have faith in fate…
That this phase of present pain will dissipate and create dreams from grief beyond realities belief…
Now I bitter sweetly close the eyes of our hearts and sadly put our love to sleep…`